


Guardian

by technoTyranny



Category: South Park
Genre: AU, Abuse, Butters is sad, Character Death, Emotional Abuse, Fear, High School, M/M, Physical Abuse, Slow Burn, Slurs, Suicidal Thoughts, add more as it goes, kenny and bebe are friends, kinnie moment, relationship, used as jokes tho
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-08-26
Updated: 2020-08-26
Packaged: 2020-09-26 22:58:12
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 10,933
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20397544
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/technoTyranny/pseuds/technoTyranny
Summary: It started so simple. Does Butters wear makeup?





	1. Confirmed

It was the first year of high school and Kenny McCormick had gone through a lot.

Being immortal and being unable to die is a traumatic thing of itself, but not having anyone remember is just as painful. Especially when the young blonde died more and more through middle school, in more gruesome ways. But through the years in high school, Stan and Kyle remained his best friends and they still hung around Eric.

Everyone had sorted themselves by then and had figured out a good part of who they were as people. Stan was an average student, a solid B, but made up for it with his extroverted personality and wicked charm. Kyle was incredibly intelligent, with the highest grades out of the boys, and kind and caring personality. Eric was a fat asshole, but one you could always buy snacks from for relatively cheap, depending on what it was.

Kenny's reputation had fluctuated often throughout the years. In elementary school, he had been known for being the poor kid who was fascinated by girl's bodies. Then in middle school, he became the token 'queer' kid, outranking the now for real dating Tweek and Craig, despite not liking the term queer. Now he was known as the cute, kinda stupid but charming blonde who you could call for a good time, wreckless behavior, a smoke, or some grungy Instagram aesthetics taken through his iPhone 5.

Then there was Butters.

Butters was an anomaly to Kenny. He was the good-hearted, kind Christian boy who wouldn't want to hurt a fly but would defend his friends to death. He was sweet, a good listener, and a great friend. Kenny wasn't close to him, not very, but Kenny was Butter's favorite person. He knew that's how the innocent blonde saw him.

Kenny, however, saw him as the twink who wore makeup.

This wasn't a bad thing to Kenny, not at all. But when he sat near Butters he couldn't understand why he felt the need to put on foundation and some other things he didn't know the name of. He was sure other people noticed, that he wasn't the only one that saw the slightly too dark makeup on the pale boy's skin. He couldn't be! Not when his friend group was so tough on everyone that they hardly let anything go without a round of ripping at least. But it was such a strange thing, the soft natural eyeshadow and blush and-

Snapping brought Kenny out of his thoughts as he looked up to Kyle. "Kenny, dude, you've been staring at Butters for five minutes. What's going on?" The redhead asked.

"He's trying to see if he can get at Butters is what," Eric commented on it with a soft snort and sip of coke.

"Oh fuck you, I wasn't," Kenny defended himself quickly with knitted brows, "But.. Have you guys noticed he wears makeup or is that just me?" He pushed his sandwich away from himself.

"What? No way," Stan ate a chip mindlessly, "Butters wouldn't wear makeup. It'd probably just look like shit anyways if he tried.

"Look at him, his hands are so much lighter than his face!" Kyle turned, keeping his eyes on the blonde as well now. "Oh my god, he is wearing makeup..!"

"Guys, I think I have the solution to this." Eric cleared his throat before standing up, cupping his hands together. "EY! Butters, get your gay ass over here!" 

Kenny noted how Butters' head whipped around and he smiled despite the vulgar comment Eric made and the annoyed glances from other tables. The blonde made his way over with his lunch box, smiling wide.

"Hey there, Fellas!" He announced in his southern lilt, giving a wave and a kind smile. He was always too nice for his own good. Kenny let some tension release from his shoulders. "What did you need me for, Eric?" Butters tilted his head to the side.

"Oh, nothing. I just wanted to know- HA!" He stole Kyle's water and sprayed it in Butters's face, making him yelp and fall back a bit, dropping his lunch box with a loud clatter that made the room go quiet. His striped shirt and shorts were soaked, and small streams of makeup began to melt off his face. "Butters is wearing makeup! Oh my god, how queer are you, Butters?!"

"What the hell is your problem?" Wendy was the first to shout over the silence, standing up with fury in her eyes. Short four eleven Wendy wasn't usually intimidating to people who didn't know her, but Eric shrunk back some. 

"Seriously, that was so mean!" Bebe stood next, crossing her arms. Much taller, by over a foot, she was a force to be reckoned with as well, nostrils flared angrily.

Soon enough Eric was getting yelled at by a good amount of the girls, shaming him for publicly humiliating Butters in such a way. But Kenny couldn't take his eyes away. Butters' face seemed to be melting, showing a bit of telltale yellow he already knew, then delving into a purple and blue around his eye. Before he could get a good look at the boy he had already run off, storming out of the cafeteria.

Kenny was quick to follow, moved by an unknown force. He found Butters in the bathroom, furiously scrubbing his face to rid himself of his shame, shoulders shaking as he sniffled. Kenny turned around and locked the door, the click making Butters jump up and turn around again. He wiped his eyes and gave a shaking smile.

"Hey, Kenny! I.. I know I don't look my best right now but... Oh, you must think I'm a sissy, huh... Crying in the school bathroom. Well if you're gonna say anything, go ahead..." He looked down, knocking his knuckles together.

In the time it took him to say that Kenny noticed three things. One, Butters wasn't resisting anything and hardly ever had. Two, he was blaming himself for the situation. And three, he had a dark bruise on his eye and more on his neck. He stepped closer and examined the black eye, it was fresh, and he could see the white of his eye turned red as well. The bruises on his neck were in the shape of hand marks, but to anyone else would look like trashy hickies. He furrowed his brow as he stared the sniffling blonde down, "What the fuck happened to you?"

Butters wiped his nose, "Oh, uh... I, em. I got into a big fight with someone... And they gave me what I deserve is all." Kenny didn't believe that for a second. He looked Butters in the eye and held a sternness. "If you're gonna lie, do it well.."

The shorter male whined, "I thought I was being sneaky too... Okay. Well, em, my dad... he, uh, he thought I was.. doing something I wasn't supposed to. But I yelled back so... He did what he had to. He hit me and grabbed me by the neck and arm.. but that's what I get for talking back! I shouldn't have been disrespectful."

Kenny shook his head and slid off his parka, wearing an old white tee shirt underneath. His freckled face was knit with worry, thin arms extending the parka. "Stay here. I'll be right back."

Butters blinked and took the jacket with a soft smile, "Thank you, Kenny..." He noticed how tan his skin was and how pretty his blue eyes were. As Kenny left Butters slid off his wet shirt and put on the oversized parka, finding comfort in the smell of stale cigarettes and masculine body spray hugging his thin figure.


	2. Safe

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kenny doesn't like what happened to Butters so he brings up his roots once more.

Kenny made his way back through the halls, feeling pretty naked without his parka on. He had his hand shoved into his sweatpants pockets, the other working on his flip phone to send a quick message as he leaned against a locker.

He let out a deep sigh and ran his hands through his hair- to say he was surprised would mean to be a complete liar. He knew how his parents treated him in the past with his constant groundings, tolerated abuse by Eric, and physical attacks he got. But he didn't know it had gotten this bad, he didn't know he was practically trained in such a way. He blamed himself for getting beaten up and that was such a shitty thing for him to go through, with just how sweet and loving the teen was.

"Hey Kenny, how's Butter doing?" Bebe walked to him, putting her phone away. She stood an inch taller than Kenny, and with her heels was three inches taller. Her neat brows were pulled with concern, fingers subconsciously picking at a perfect nail.

"He's in the bathroom right now. Do you have any makeup..? I don't know how to do it right like you do." Kenny looked up to her, his shoulder on the metal wall of lockers.

"Of course I do..! Eric is such a jerk. Who cares if a boy wants to do makeup and look pretty? It's none of his business!" She huffed, unlocking the door and pulling out her heavy makeup bag. Kenny began to lead her off to the boy's bathroom again.

"Um. I don't know how much I should tell you but he doesn't do it to look pretty. If that were the case I honestly wouldn't have called you." Kenny shrugged some, looking off from the curly-haired girl.

"Damn, cruel. I guess I'll see why when we get there but my point still stands." She smirked, "You should let me do your makeup! I think you'd look cute with a bit of blush and eyeliner. Really make them baby blues pop!" 

Kenny snorted, "Oh please, in your dreams, dyke."

"Okay, queer, whatever you say." Bebe hit his shoulder with a laugh.

When Bebe walked into the boys' bathroom without much care she gasped seeing Butters. All the makeup had melted away and he hugged Kenny's parka, sitting on the floor. She went and knelt down, "Oh my god, you poor thing! What happened to you?" She frowned, setting out makeup. 

"Um, er, well," Butters started off then faded. "I got into a real bad fight. I just didn't want people to get all concerned is all! But I guess I failed at that, too.."

Kenny frowned.

It was a bit of a lengthy process, with Bebe showing him good techniques to hide bruises. Bebe was familiar as Wendy was pretty nasty when it came to leaving marks. They were pretty much shameless when it came to showing off, Bebe especially loved to talk about her escapades with Kenny, without giving off to much to hurt Wendy. But that knowledge really helped to cover up the dark splotches as much as she could.

"Here- I have a spare sweater in my locker. You can wear that and give it back whenever. If this happens again, let me know and I'll kick some ass for you." Bebe gave him a sweet smile and hugged Butters' head right to her chest.

"Oh, gee, thank you..." Butters said softly, his arms around her waist as he hugged back the much taller woman. 

Butters changed into the sweater with some lesbian erotic singer on the front as the bell rang. Kenny walked back in uncomfortable silence besides Butters' gentle humming, holding his parka and Butters' shirt over his arm. He stole a glance at the shorter, his makeup looked much more even now, he couldn't even tell he was wearing it. It was kind of worrying... He couldn't remember how long Butters had been wearing makeup. How long was he covering up bruises that nobody knew or really cared about? The thought made his stomach twist as they got back to the classroom with a few idle stares.

-

Butters pulled on his sweatpants for the night as he crawled into bed. His bruises were visible on his face, hurriedly washing his face from makeup when his parents came home. On an empty stomach, he pulled the blankets over himself, letting himself relax on the pillows with an arm behind his head.

Kenny was awful nice. He didn't have to help him and honestly didn't expect him to care very much but he was nice. He felt warm when he was in Kenny's parka, the smell was comforting to him.

Oh no.

He turned and pulled his covers over his head. He didn't want to think of Kenny like that! That was his friend! He didn't even think Kenny cared about him much outside of their general antics they dealt with on a day to day basis.

There was the small sound of his window opening from outside. Butters gasped and sat up. He looked to the figure in his window, blinking in surprise.

"What.. what are you doing?"

A shadowed figure was sitting in the window, knelt down on the sill. They had on a hood and dark sweatpants, face covered with a black mask hiding everything except their eyes.

"Leo... You won't have to worry about getting hurt anymore." The figure had a deep, gruff voice. "If anyone lays a hand on you, I'll know." 

"What do you mean? I.. I don't understand. What did you do?"

"You don't need to worry about it. Just know that you're safe. I'll come check on you every night from now on to make sure they haven't hurt you."

"You'll seriously do that for me? I... wow, thank you." Butters gave a sweet smile to the covered body.

"I have to go. I'll be seeing you soon, Leo."

Butters watched as he dropped the window back down then left quickly on foot. The blonde felt a warmth in his heart as he held his blankets to his chest. He.. didn't have to be worried about getting hurt anymore. For some reason, he doubted it fully, but he felt safe either way. He sunk back down onto his bed, pulling the soft fuzzy fabric up to his chin as he closed his eyes.


	3. Unwilling

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Things get pretty heated with the Stotch family

When Butters woke up in the morning, he could smell breakfast from downstairs. He pulled on his clothes for the day and fixed up his hair, putting on a bit of cologne and deodorant before going downstairs. The conversation he had rung through his mind...

He was safe now. He supposed that would be put to the test.

He came down the last step and his father, as usual, was the only one home. He had a bad bedhead and his shoulders were narrowed down to hunch over the skillet.

"Hey, dad..!" Butters tried to greet in a cheerful voice. Stephen jumped up and whipped around, face pale. Butters had never seen him like this.

"Good morning son... I have your breakfast ready and lunch packed so... I-I'm gonna get ready for work now!" He pushed past his son and went upstairs to dress.

Butters was dumbfounded. Was his father avoiding him now? Did he do something so wrong that his dad wasn't even going to give him the time of day?

Butters sat down in front of a sad, soggy pancake and ate slowly as his dad hurried out the door without so much of a word.

-

When Butters got to school he could hear the whispering in the hallways about the day before. His makeup was better than yesterday as well, he could hide the bruises easier thanks to Bebe's advice. He went to his locker and unlocked it, opening it up and putting his books inside.

"Hey, Butters!" Bebe said as she walked with Wendy, holding her hand. "How are you doing? Is everything okay?"

"Oh, uh, hey ladies." The blonde smiled softly as he got out his organic chem book and notes, shutting the door. "I"m alright. Thanks a lot for yesterday, I-I'm gonna wash your sweater before I give it back. Don't want boy smell on it."

"Butters, you do know that what Eric did wasn't a joke, right?" Wendy looked up at him. "He was doing it to publically humiliate you, make you seem like a freak at school. That's wrong." 

"Hm? Oh, I don't mind it. Eric has always been a bit of a mean ol' butthead. It ain' the worse he's done to me!" Butters flashed his sweet smile.

Bebe looked to Wendy with defeated eyes, and Wendy held pity in her heart.

"Hey, uh... W-where's Ken?" Butters asked, pressing his knuckles together.

"Oh, I haven't seen him anywhere," Bebe said pretty quickly. "He might have cut today and ran off with Craig somewhere.."

"Tweek would know that if he did, Bebe," Wendy said with a slight teasing lilt.

Whatever conversation the ladies had after was quiet to Butters. He didn't hear it. Kenny wasn't there. His dad was avoiding him and now Kenny was too. Wasn't he? He must have gotten sick of him after yesterday and didn't want to talk at school, he must be annoyed and doesn't wanna interact more than he has too. He felt a bubble of guilt in his gut as he went to his first class.

It wasn't until lunch that he saw Kenny again, all of his advanced classes were in the morning so he and his friends could have breaks together. He barely got into the cafeteria before an announcement came onto the intercom.

'ALRIGHT EVERYONE, LISTEN UP. I NEED BUTTERS STOTCH TO THE PRINCIPAL OFFICE IMMEDIATELY. BUTTERS STOTCH TO THE PRINCIPALS OFFICE.'

Butters could feel the shame rising on his face as he left the cafeteria, suddenly feeling hundreds of eyes on him at once.

The walk to the office was quiet until he knocked on the door, where PC Principal, Mr. Mackey, and his homeroom teacher, Mr. Titchner was sitting.

"Butters, why don't you go ahead and have a seat?" PC said, motioning to the chair in front of them.

"Oh geez, am I in trouble..?" Butters asked, feeling small under the gaze of the three advisors.

"Not in trouble, Butters." Mr. Titchner responded cooly, "We just have to ask you a few questions. Mr. Mackey..?"

"Mkay, Butters, just answer these as truthfully as you can..? Have you ever stayed at a friend's house to avoid going home?"

"Uh, yes?" Butters responded.

"Have your parents ever insulted you or belittled you in any way?"

"Uhhhhh... sometimes." Butters felt his heart sink to his chest.

"Mkay, how about threatened physical violence on you?"

It went on like this for about half an hour until the man decided he heard enough. Butters was ready to cry at this point.

"You did really well, Butters. Thank you for your input. We'll get back to you if you need you again." PC waved him out.

Butters walked back to the classroom but took a detour to the boys' bathroom, locking himself in, feeling a lump in his throat as he felt his phone buzz over and over.

-

"I'm not going in there."

"Dude, don't be an asshole, Butters is our friend."

This was the fourth time Butters had locked himself in the bathrooms. The first time in elementary school, the next two times in middle, and now in high school. Nothing could be heard from inside but like the other three times, people gathered around the door, watching for the manic blonde.

"Kenny, go in there and get a hold of your girlfriend, I have to take a monster shit." Eric puffed out, arms crossed, not invested in this storyline at all.

"He's not my girlfriend. Get off my dick, fatass." Kenny glared at him, eyes narrowed at the overweight teen.

"Yeah, because you want Butters on your dick instead, right?" Eric pulled a proud grin. Everyone disliked that.

Not giving in to giving him a response, Kenny looked to the door and sighed. He stepped forward and knocked on it, hearing the lock click timidly before opening a crack. He was then yanked forward by the shorter man into the room, then the door was locked again. He could hear Eric's stupid laughter from outside.

"What the fuck, dude?" Kenny asked, looking to the shorter who was crouched down on the ground, leaning against a stall.

"P-Principal and M-Mr. Mackey and Mr. Titchner asked a-about my parents..! CPS w-was called on the-them..!" He blubbered into his knees, and Kenny realized his phone was on the sinks. Taking up the device he pressed the home button and oh Jesus fuck.

There were threats from both his mother and father. His mother seemed more interested in emotionally manipulating him, asking why he hated them and why he wanted them to go to prison so bad. His dad threatened physical violence, saying he didn't care about his little teenager friend threatening them, and if Butters ever pulled that again he would kill him. He looked to the sobbing teen and went over, kneeling down beside him.

"Butters.. how about you walk home with me today?" 

"What? No! My parents would be real sore if I didn't come home, they'd call the cops..!"

"And if they do, we'll have evidence of threats. You may still have to live under their rule but like hell am I letting you go back there again." He held the blonde's shoulder.

Butters sniffled before shaking his head, "Kenny... It's mighty nice of you but... I-I can't. They'd really get upset with me and I've already made things so bad with them.." He didn't back away from his touch, and Kenny sat down beside him. His makeup was running again, showing faint streaks of purple around his eye.

"Okay, okay... Look, if anything happens.. call me. Okay? I'll be right over..." Kenny said gently.

Butters wiped his face as best he could. "I-If my parents don't take my phone.."

Kenny was about to say something before he stopped himself, "If your parents don't take your phone, right... If you can, message me tonight. I won't in case your parents take your phone and flip the fuck out even more.."

Butters looked up to him before taking Kenny into a big hug, hiding into his shoulder. "Thanks, Ken..." He said softly into the fabric of his shirt.

"Yeah... no problem." Kenny felt his cheeks warm slightly as he wrapped an arm around his waist, helping him up. "Let's get you cleaned up again, okay?"

Butters gave his warm, innocent smile. "Okay..."

Kenny felt his chest tighten.


	4. Home

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kenny has had it

Butters was sick on his way home. He had never been so anxious in his life. Bile rose from his throat and threatened to spill onto the ground. He wasn't ready to go home and his feet trudged slightly, making a ten-minute walk now working on 20. God, what was he going to do?

He got to his driveway and saw an unfamiliar car. He wanted to cry. He was terrified as he walked into his home.

Inside was a case manager, a nice woman who he didn't remember the name of. She asked similar questions to the school. Except this time, Butters lied through the entire thing. He said how much he loved his parents and how they never hurt him. He had never been so thankful that he had on makeup. The woman left and he was alone with the seething gaze of his father, his mother collapsed on the bed and sobbing loudly.

"You think this is funny?" Stephen asked, nostrils flared. Butters swallowed and his shoulders narrowed.

"N-No, sir.." He whispered.

"Speak UP!" He grabbed his shirt. "You've pulled some serious crap! You called your friend to threaten us? How dare you! Then you call the COPS on us? How mortified do you think we were to find out we were being questioned and threatened to be put in jail?! You terrified your poor mother to death!"

"I-I'm sorry, Sir!" Butters blubbered, snot and tears running down his face. "I didn't ask n-nobody to come a-and-"

Butters heard the harsh crack of a slap before he felt the jerk of his head then sting, making him let out a choked sob, cowering as he covered his face. It only made it worse. He was gonna die.

-

Hours later, Stephen lay in bed with his wife. The woman sniffled softly, "I-I just don't know what we're gonna do with him..! H-he doesn't wanna be here anymore..!"

"Come now, Linda. I've been looking into it and there's places for boys like him who have behavioral issues..." Stephen explained softly, holding her close to his chest.

"B-but therapy doesn't work on him! You know it doesn't!" Linda wailed.

"This is different! It isn't just a talk with a therapist. Apparently, these people can control his issues with minor shocks delivered to the brain, correcting their behavior. Look, there's even proof of it working.."

He spoke and their window slipped open. A tall, long figure moved in, crouching at the floor before perching at the edge of the bed. The two shrieked at the sight and Stephen immediately went for the phone. The figure knocked it from his hand and in a swift movement had him pinned to the bed under his knees.

"I thought I told you bastards not to lay a hand on him." The figure sneered, eyes dark behind his hood. Stephen made quick work of shoving him away, brute strength on his side as he stood.

"If you don't leave right now we will call the cops!" He shouted, guarding Linda against the attacker.

"If there were any justice you'd be in jail right now! Damnit!" He yelled out, rushing forward. Stephen had strength but he had wits and speed. Plus if Stephen went down, Linda would too.

Stephen seemed a half step ahead and grabbed a fist full of hair through his hood. He snarled and gripped the man's wrist, and despite it being painful, twisted around and brought his knee where it hurts.

He kicked him as hard as he could in the balls.

Stephen cried and went down to his knees, face red and bile in his throat. Linda came forward and the figure lurched, going to the dresser. He grabbed a bottle of hairspray and it went right into her eyes, making her shriek and start sobbing.

The figure left quickly, bringing himself from the window to the left and swinging over to the one on the right. He shimmied the frame open and kneeled in it, where Butters lay, having not noticed until now that the figure was there. He knew, he heard the shrieks from the neighboring room, but he didn't know the figure was there before. He sat up slow and his heart sank.

Butters had a busted lip and his cheeks were red and marked from being slapped over and over. It seemed now Stephen had wised up with his beatings because bruises were under his collar, he could barely see the outlines of firm hand marks where he was gripped with bruising force. The blonde sniffled and rubbed his eyes.

"You actually beat them up..." Butters said softly, voice meek and raw, eyes puffy from crying.

"I had to. I told them the consequences if they hurt you and didn't listen. I didn't do my worst." The figure calmly explained.

"They sounded like they were in so much pain.."

"They're overdramatic, Leo. That's how their kind works."

"We don't have school tomorrow..." Butters said shakily.

"And you won't be staying here."

"I won't?"

"No. Have your stuff ready to be gone for a few days, okay?"

"But my parents-"

"I don't care about your parents. Do as I say. Someone will be here to help you tomorrow."

Butters wasn't given room to argue. He gave a solemn nod and the figure left, closing the window and hitting the ground running.

Kenny arrived back home late that night, taking off his hood. His hands folded it slow, the cold bite of the air still in the home. At least it was clean.

Since Kevin left for college on a football scholarship and dad left, it was him, mom, and Karen. Kenny liked it better this way. His mom picked up a waitress job as well as selling pot on the side, which admittedly, gave them a good amount of cash to work with. Karen had a small part-time job of walking dogs and occasionally babysitting Stripe, not to provide for the home, but to make her own money. Kenny sold pot to the kids at school sometimes, unable to get a stable job at the moment.

His mom was trying her hardest and at least she actually cared about them, giving love and support where their father's republican ways kept them from progressing.

"Is that poor boy comin' home with ya tomorrow, Ken?" Carol asked, her sweet southern lilt startling Kenny slightly, but the blonde nodded.

"I'm gonna pick him up in the truck if that's okay."

They didn't know where Dad went. Honestly, Kenny didn't care about the drunken piece of shit.

"Of course it is, baby. Poor thing... Damn police won't get involved either. Least we can have him over for the weekend, right?" The redhead tried to comfort her worrying son, cupping his cheeks with a small smile.

"Yeah... I guess." He answered quietly.

Kenny was anxious. He went to his room and stripped to his boxers, laying on his bed. His house wasn't the best still. He knew that. He didn't think Butters would care but it still ate him up. That and how sad Butters looked, how broken he was, how angry his parents were. It made him sick to his stomach thinking about it.

Thinking about how much of an **_asshole_** he was as a kid.

He didn't sleep that night.


	5. Superhero

The morning was cold, like every morning in the small Colorado town. Kenny was freezing his dick off but he always did, even with the blankets he piled onto his mattress. Standing up and pulling on his parka he looked in the mirror.

His eyes were tired. He was usually a pretty laid back dude. He laughed with his friends and made perverted jokes about pretty much anything he could. He hooked up with chicks and guys, he watched gorey movies and crude comedies. He partied, he got so fucking high, he did a lot.

Why was he so concerned and worried all of a sudden? What changed him so drastically that he could hardly message his friends back? Why was he so. Damn. Tired.

He didn't want to know.

Going downstairs the house was still quiet. His mom was off to work and Karen was asleep. He had checked on the sleeping pre-teen as he left. He grabbed the truck keys- Carol's work was a short walk away- and got in. He pulled out and began to drive off.

It was about 10 in the morning. People were busying through the streets, going from store to store. He didn't care about them. He went to Butters' house immediately.

He pulled up into the drive and froze in place. There were bars on his fucking window. There were bars. On the fucking. Bedroom window. Fuck.

He didn't have time to care. Holding his keys outward in his hand as Heidi once showed the boys, he went up to the door. He knocked.

Stephen came to the door. His eyes narrowed at the sight of the shorter blonde, nostrils flared.

"I'm sorry, Kenny, but Butters is grounded right now. He can't come out and play. When he learns to be RESPECTFUL-" He called up the stairs to shame the boy, "AND LISTEN TO HIS PARENTS, MAYBE HE'LL BE ALLOWED OUT."

Kenny felt his hand tremble. Alright, fucker, he knew how this psychotic man was playing. He could handle this.

"He didn't do anything wrong," Kenny snapped, eyes dark and not having this shit, "He didn't report nothing. Just let him out... please." He hated having to fake being polite for this asshole. It made him sick.

"How do you know why he's grounded in the first place?!" Stephen raised his voice and Kenny felt his heart race. He wasn't thinking. He couldn't.

He leaned back, then dug the blunt key into his cheek, deep into his skin. The larger man let out a screech and he fell back, so Kenny fucking booked it up the stairs. Linda shrieked loudly and went for the phone.

If Kenny could just get to the boy's room and get him out. That's all he needed. That's all he had to do.

He got upstairs and noticed the many locks on Butter's doors. He worked quick to unlock them, hands shaking in his fright. When he swung the door open Butters cried out and nearly toppled to the ground, looking up in surprise, having been eavesdropping.

"Ken?!" The blonde shakily asked. He stood up, knees weak, and Kenny felt his chest tighten. He grabbed his hand desperately.

"We gotta go," The taller stated and pulled him along. Butters whimpered and pulled away from his grip, just past his room.

"Ken, I can't! My parents are already super mad at me! If I ran away like this, I'd.." He began to choke up.

"Butters, you said you would-"

"I was _**SCARED**_ last night, Ken! I agreed before I could think! I can't go! I can't- I'm sorry."

Kenny cursed loudly and he could hear police sirens close in and stop right outside of the house. The large redheaded cop came in and two rookies began to tend to Stephen's injury, while three went with the cop at the base of the stairs.

"Oh Jesus, oh no.." Butters began to wail, everything was too much. It was all too overwhelming.

"Come down with your hands up!" The cop called out loudly, "There won't be any trouble if you come down now!"

Kenny looked to Butters with pain. God, he fucked up. He knew he did. Everything happened so fast, he tried to be a hero but he wasn't. He wasn't a hero anymore. He was just... Kenny.

Butters sniffled and cried and Kenny took his hand. Slowly, he began to walk down the stairs, breathing calm. He hated the police. They made him sick. His hand was shaking.

Stephen's screaming voice was muted in his ears. The cops backed away and Kenny stepped down, letting Butters' hand go. He held them up, trying to appear calm.

The cops began to read him his rights, barking them at them. Kenny wasn't a hero anymore. He was just a teenager in over his head who rushed things along to try and save someone he cared about deeply. He looked to Butters sadly as his hands were forced behind his back.

He saw how much he fucked up and he knew what he had to do.

See, he may not be a hero but he still had powers. Powers he could only thank his crackhead parents for. His cultist parents. He knew that he had to do this.

He had to reset, make everything better. He had to start over, and this time, come up with an actual plan. A way to help, not just for himself. But for Butters.

Yeah. For _Butters_.

He twisted his hands in the cops just before he could get the cuffs on and kicked him hard. He grabbed the gun in his holder and aimed it at the chief.

Kenny could hear Butter's shrieking his name. It was heartbreaking. Nobody ever sounded like that when he did this. It was usually an "Oh my god-" Then he faded out. Nobody screamed like they were the ones being shot at by three officers, twice in the chest, then his head.

-

Kenny found out that as he got older, the more was erased from people's memories and the hazier the situation surrounding his death was. When he was a kid it would just be the death that people forgot but now it was whatever lead up to it.

Carol gave birth in the middle of the floor and was sent home, thankfully given maternity leave. She set the baby down on Kenny's bed and wrapped it in a blanket before passing out. It took him 72 hours to go back to normal. He flexed his fingers before resting them on his pounding head. Thank fucking god his mom and sister didn't know about his death.

Tuesday he could finally go back to school. When people asked why he missed he said he had stomach problems. They dismissed it. He looked for Butters.

Okay, now he knew he couldn't rush in to save or stalk as he did with Mysterion anymore. Not again. He had to be meticulous and sneaky, he had to have Butters realize the problems. He had to convince him.

Like that was easy.

He spotted the blonde at his locker, once again, wearing makeup. He looked tired. His eyes were bloodshot like he had been crying. Kenny walked over.

"Hey."

Butters looked up, smiling gently. A sad smile. He gave a small nod, "Hey.."

"You wanna come over this weekend?" Kenny asked, leaning on the metal doors. "We can play those games you like on my GameCube."

"Oh, well, I'm sorry, Ken. But I'm grounded for two weeks... I got in a fight with my dad and I back talked to him. Well, that's what I get for being a smart mouth.." He shook his head.

Kenny grits his teeth but nodded. So they were back to that, apparently. He could work with that. Everything after that had been because of him after all. "Okay. What about after?"

Butters smiled brighter this time, "Well sure Ken..! I gotta go, Mr. Titchner is a stickler for bein' late.." The blonde moved passed Kenny.

Butters sounded like he had a sore throat.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> don't worry, it isn't quite a total reset. the last few chapters are still very important to the story :)


	6. Visit

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After the two week reset, Kenny intends to make things right

Two weeks passed and it felt like a fucking eternity.

Kenny kept close to Butters. He made sure he was okay and kept people from talking shit, glaring hard whenever someone made some comment on the teenager. He made sure his parents didn't hurt him too badly and kept a close eye on his behavior so he wouldn't hurt himself as well.

Kenny found out some things about him he didn't know otherwise. Butters still danced. Not tap dancing anymore but he did ballet, he was pretty graceful too and Kenny would be lying if he didn't look damn good in a pair of tights. He was, again, a national level dancer, but he missed his practices when he was grounded, his instructor was pretty understanding.

Butters also was seriously into musicals. He didn't like a lot of modern musicals, like Hamilton or Be More Chill, but he was a big fan of classics, like Cats, Annie, Mama Mia, Grease, and such. He had a couple soundtracks downloaded and when he was stressed he would listen to them. Butters had a nice singing voice as well. At one point, during the break period, he hung outside with the goths (vampires? emos?) and Kenny could hear him sing along to their loathing and nihilistic music, his voice not matching the words but sounding lovely anyways. 

Butters sometimes tutored other people, and he found out he even tutored Cartman. And by that Cartman would harass him into doing his homework. It pissed Kenny off and when he brought it up, Cartman snorted in his face and told him it was "using viable resources." Kenny slapped the back of his head, hard.

Butters still had the scar from when Kenny threw a star in his eye.

Butters liked himself more when he was Professor Chaos and still had the costume.

After Butters became ungrounded, Kenny had him over that weekend. The week was quiet with Kenny not there stirring up trouble. It still stressed him out not knowing if Butters was safe or not but he managed. Butters walked his way to the bad side of town, insisting his dad does not drive him and he makes his way by himself.

Butters knocked on the door and waited, sleeping bag in hand.

The short, slightly pudgy figure of Karen appeared, blinking up at the blonde. Butters gave a smile.

"Hey there, Karen. Uh, is Kenny here?" He asked, tilting his head. She smiled wide and nodded, "Mhm! He's just taking a shower. Come in!" She tugged the blonde inside.

The home smelled of cigarettes and pot but the floor was clean aside from old stains when Kevin and their dad lived here. The TV was on some kids' show, Karen watching it before he came. Carol was pulling on an apron and tying her red hair back when she saw Butters, coming over and smiling and hugging him to her chest.

"Hey there, baby...! Kenny said you'd be coming over. I'm sorry if the place isn't neat, but I'm happy to have you here..!" 

"Oh, no ma'am..!" Butters hugged back, leaning into her with a smile. "It's fine, I don't mind! Thank you for having me.."

"It's no problem, baby... I work late tonight so take care, okay?" She kissed his forehead, leaving a pink mark on him, making the blonde blush. 

"I'll see you later mommy..!" Karen gave her mom a hug and Butters smiled at the purity. It didn't last long, however, and Karen grabbed his hand.

"Come play with me..!" She tugged him along. Butters made a surprised sound but then laughed, following after her.

Her room was small and cute. She had old drawings up and a window was colored in on her wall, her bed was pink as well as her curtains. It smelled of cheap bubblegum perfume and the room was very well cleaned. She sat him down on the floor and got out one of those shitty dollar store makeup kids, sitting in front of him.

"Kenny's been talking about you for a while. He does it all the time." She jumped right into mentioning the taller blonde as she worked on some eyeshadow. Butters blushed under his foundation.

"Is that so? What has he said about me, huh?" He smiled and closed his eyes.

"He says he's worried about you and hates your stupid parents." She said bluntly, painting his eyelid in a sparkly blue mess. "He wanted you over so you could have a break. He said he messed up before and wouldn't do it again? I dunno."

Butters furrowed his brow. Messed up before? Do it again? He didn't understand. Did he worry about him though? That was a first. He didn't get it. Why did Kenny suddenly worry about him? It's not like he did before...

"Kenny is a good big brother. He cares a lot and helps. He cares about you, too! He isn't great at showing it because he's dumb but still. He and my guardian angel are the best..."

"Guardian angel?" Butters questioned.

"My guardian angel! He wore a purple costume and would always come when I'm sad. I haven't seen him in a while because I haven't been sad. Mommy and Kenny are taking care of me so I think my angel knows I'm happy..."

Butters smiled. Mysterion. Kenny would be the type to do that. They certainly were bigger now and the costumes they once wore hardly fit anymore, that was the most likely reason he didn't show up as an "angel" anymore. And she was only ten, so she must still believe it.

"I think your angel is a really nice fella, Karen. He must really love you, huh?"

"Mhm!" Karen pulled back and pulled his fluffy hair into some pretty clips, then showed him in the mirror. One eye was blue and the other was pink, his lips were glittery and his hair pulled down the middle and into tiny pigtails. "Pretty as a princess!"

"Oh, thank you! I feel like a princess, all dolled up like this." Butters giggled, holding the mirror and looking at himself over dramatically. "I guess I need a knight now, huh?"

"What's your princess name? I'll be your knight!" Karen held his hands and Butters grinned.

"Hm... Margarine. How does that sound?" He suggested and Karen nodded, "I'll protect you, princess Margarine!"

Kenny knocked on the door before opening it. He had on a tank top and sweatpants, hair slightly damp and looking between the two. He smiled softly and crossed his arms, raising a brow. "Sorry, Karen, but I need to steel my friend back."

"No!" Karen grabbed a pillow, standing in front of Butters with a heroic stance. "I'm the knight and I need to protect princess Margarine and you can't have her!"

Butters fanned himself, "My knight in shining armor! Protect me from this brute!"

Kenny narrowed his eyes at the challenge and grinned, "I thought you were Princess Kenny's knight!"

"Not anymore! I protect Princess Margarine!" Karen stood tall before squeaking as Kenny picked her up, hauling her over his shoulder.

"Does Knight Karen accept bribes in the form of mac n cheese?"

"Ooh, yes!"

Butters gasped in offense, "Karen! My knight! What about me!"

Kenny set her down, "Sorry Princess Margarine, but looks like you've lost." Kenny picked Butters up now and made him yell, "By law, we have to get married now."

Karen gagged, "Ew!" And hit her brother's knee with a pillow.

Butters could hardly hear the laughter, face flushed, covering it with his hands."Oh geez, Ken...!"

-

Dinner was simple mac n cheese and water. Butters didn't mind. He showered and washed his face off afterward, going to play video games with Kenny as Karen went to play in her own room. They played cheap Mario and PacMan games until about midnight when they got ready for bed. Butters brought his sleeping bag up and laid it out, humming softly.

Kenny got ready for bed as well, pulling off his sweats and laying in boxers and a tee-shirt, He curled up under the sheets as Butters shuffled down in his clothes, before the blonde bit his lip.

"Hey, uh, Ken, I should warn you about something.."

Kenny turned over. "What is it..?"

Butters messed with his fingers, "I've kinda been having night terrors. I wake up and start crying... I'm sorry if I wake you up." His voice got quieter.

Kenny furrowed his brow, "Night terrors..? About what."

Butters knocked his knuckles together, "Um... About..."

Kenny slid off the bed and sat next to Butters on the floor. His eye was worried, Butters had never had night terrors before, not that he knew of. This was new. He wanted to take Butters' hand but he stopped himself, retreating it back to his lap. "C'mon. You can tell me. Maybe it'll help..."

"Uh, well..." Butters started, "It's about you."

Kenny stared in disbelief.

"it's about you and all the ways you die..."


	7. Secrative

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Butters isn't innocent.

Kenny's heart sank some. What the fuck did Butters just say to him? His heart raced increased and he didn't know what to say at first, staring at him, before dumbly saying, "Huh?"

"I-it started not that long ago.. I started having these awful nightmares, and every time you died... They always got so graphic. Sometimes you were crushed or sometimes it was a chainsaw or a sickness o-or whatever but... I hated it. I kept telling myself it wasn't real because it isn't but it still gives me the heebie-jeebies. You know?"

Kenny nodded along as if Butters didn't describe ways that he had died. Okay, this was new. Nobody knew about his deaths. Nobody ever believed him and he didn't tell Butters because he would think he was making it up for pure attention. But now he was having nightmares about him? Jesus.

"... Yeah. It's fake. I don't mind though." He thought a moment, "When I was younger, Kevin would have bad night terrors too. His problem was he couldn't say them right because of his autism. Turns out he kept seeing a giant shadow man in the corner of his room and started freaking out. It woke up Karen. And of course, Karen woke me up. So we would all sleep on the couch, piled up, watching shitty Andy Griffin reruns until we passed out again and dad yelled at us for being late for school."

Butters smiled at that. Kevin and him didn't interact much but he knew Kevin was a big brute in his later years before he left, standing tall and terrifying to anyone who didn't know his dopey nature. It was surprising that his girlfriend, Shelly Marsh, was the one you needed to be terrified of and not this giant hulking figure.

"Thanks, Ken... I'll see you tomorrow." Butters said softly.'

"Night, Butters."

Butters slept peacefully that night.

\-----

The next day, Butters woke up to frozen waffles and powdered milk supplement. He smiled and spent a good amount of the day with Kenny and Karen before he got a message. 

"Shoot, I have to go..." The blonde frowned and picked up his coat, sighing.

"Already?" Karen whined, holding his sleeve so Butters wouldn't leave.

"Yeah. I can't stay here much longer... I'm sorry. I'll see you on Monday, okay, Ken?"

Kenny frowned before nodding, "Yeah, yeah, okay. See you Monday."

Butters left the house after gathering his things with a smile. He walked down the streets and to his house where he quietly entered despite his parents not being home. He felt dirty when he did this like he was lying to everyone. He set his things down and locked the door again before going to his neighbor's.

He knocked on the door twice, paused three seconds, then a third time. Cartman opened the door and pulled him in with a deep kiss, holding his waist and shutting the door hard.

"I've missed you, babe," Cartman said softly.

"I missed you too, Eric..." Butters said back meekly, with a gentle smile.


	8. Reality

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A night at Eric's and a realization.

While the relationship might come to a surprise to some, it came naturally to the two who were gently kissing in Eric's living room. Butter's had his hands on Eric's broad shoulders and their lips met in soft, sweet kisses. There was a sense of warmth and familiarity to the situation. Butters felt comfortable in the hold of the taller man, like a security blanket covered his entire body.

He pulled away after a moment and gave a soft, sweet smile to the taller boy. Eric's hair was mussed, he smelled like his lavender Old Spice shampoo. He must have just showered. He had on a big, gray hoodie with a pair of black sweats that really did him favors. Eric became totally fuckable in the last year of middle school when the fat-boy joined the football team and suddenly that fat was becoming muscle. He didn't get ripped with strong abs or whatever, but where he had pudge before he had strength in his core. His arms and legs were strong and sturdy. Butter's liked that. He liked Eric.

\-----

"Butters."

"Eric?"

Liane had called and said she was going to be late, so she asked Eric to start making dinner. For Eric, that meant heating up leftovers. Eric had matured, sure, but still had that childishness and laziness at his core. Butters was not in the mood for reheated lasagna and took it upon himself to make baked chicken and potatoes. It was domestic, sort of, cooking for the brunette while he sat at the dinner table and watched. 

"When did you learn to cook like this?"

"My mom taught me last year. She taught me how to make a few good dinners by herself, but mostly how to find good recipes online and how to make them better." Butters smiled fondly, remembering the nights where she called him into the kitchen and asked for his help. Of course it was a ruse to teach him how to cook so he could when she didn't feel like it, but that didn't stop the blonde from enjoying it.

"Butters."

"Eric?"

"... Are you mad at me?" Eric stood and went behind Butters, wrapping his arms around his waist. Butters hummed gently as he seasoned the potatoes. (The seasonings were skimpy in this house, but he made do with what he could. He found he liked cooking at Token's, Michael's, and Kyle's house the most because they always have a lot of spice.)

"Why do you ask that?"

"Because," Eric started calmly, "You haven't turned around when I do this." He squeezed Butter's hip. "You always look at me when I hug you from behind, even when you're brushing your teeth or fixing your hair or getting dressed."

Butters frowned and turned around, cupping Eric's cheeks. He placed a sweet kiss to his lips, "Better?"

"No, not really, but it is appreciated."

The blonde sighed, "I'm awful sorry, Eric.. I-I have a lot on my mind is all."

"Yeah?" The taller asked softly.

"Yeah.. B-but I won't bore ya with the details."

Eric shook his head and slid one hand up his side, lacing their fingers together. "You don't bore me."

Butters fucking melted and sighed, "Well.. O-okay. I had a dream last night.. I-I had wore makeup to school and you called me something awful b-before throwin' water at my face. Showing off my bruises.."

Eric's lips pursed, "You're mad at me because of something I did in a dream?"

"I said I'm not mad!" Butters exclaimed, "But.. i-it got me thinkin', you know? That's how I'd want ya to respond i-if someone brought up the makeup.. That's how everyone would expect ya too."

Eric nodded along, mismatched eyes watching the smaller.

"It's jus'.. So stupid. We both have to hide to keep a reputation. I-If the football team knew you were gay you risk your sports career.. and i-if people know I'm gay then.." The blonde trailed off.

"You wanted to keep it a secret." Eric stated, "You didn't want anyone knowing. You won't even tell Scott, for fucks sake-!"

"I know that!" Butters pulled back, voice raised. "But that doesn't mean I can't be upset about it!"

"I-" Eric stopped himself, took a deep breath, and let it out slow. "You're right. You're right, and I'm sorry. I get why we have to keep it secret. It isn't your fault."

The blonde shook his head and turned back to his food, hands working to distract himself from thinking about the situation he was in. Eric leaned down and nuzzled into the back of his neck, pressing a soft kiss against the delicate skin there.

"Butters?"

"Eric."

"When your parents don't own you anymore, I want to help make you happy." 

Eric's breath tickled his skin and gave him goosebumps. Nobody knew how domestic he was in private. Nobody knew of the soft touches, the sweet words whispered in his ear. Nobody knew how he would kiss his pulse and up his arms, overwhelming the blonde with affection. Nobody knew how he would cry into the taller's shoulder when the school day was over because it all hurt so much.

Butters turned and kissed his lips. "I know."

\-----

Kenny found himself incredibly bored the rest of the day. Sure, he had Karen to watch TV with, but without Butters it didn't feel quite the same. Not after spending the weekend together. He sighed and brought his knees up to his chest, nose scrunched up in distate at the old cartoons they watched together.

"You got it bad." Karen said after a moment, picking at cheap old nail polish.

"Huh?"

"You're not as happy since Butters left. How long until you tell him?" Karen looked up to her older brother, a curious look in her eye.

Kenny held that same look because he didn't know what the fuck she meant. "Tell him what?"

"That you like him, dumb dumb."

"Whoa, whoa," Kenny held up his hands. "You are way off base with that one, Karen. I don't like Butters. I-I mean- yeah, he's a good friend, and I care about him, but I don't like him, okay?"

"Cut the shit," Karen rolled her eyes and Kenny was surprised to hear such foul language from his baby sister's mouth. (Why was he so surprised? He was the exact same way when he was her age.)

"When you laughed, you looked at him to see if he was laughing too. When you made breakfast you used mom's chocolate to make it taste better. You know she would be upset if she found out about that! You did that for him, not me, because you know I like strawberry more. You look at him like Eugine looks at Rapunzel."

And everything hit Kenny like a fucking truck because he couldn't argue against her. Where did she get that intelligence from because it sure as hell wasn't from his family. She didn't even look at him but his mouth was agape, trying to deny her accusations about his feelings. But he couldn't. Because when he thought about it, he did all those things. He couldn't help himself. He didn't notice at first, that he was doing it, but now when he thought about it he couldn't come close to denyin it. And it weighed down on him like the world sat upon his shoulders.

Was he in love with Butters?


	9. Confrontations

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kenny has decided to own up to his crush!

Kenny had made a decision the night before school. He was in love with Butters Stotch, and he was going to confess.

Okay, in truth, the decision wasn't actually Kenny's, but Karen's. She was the one who made him realize how he felt, and she was the one who convinced him to ask out the other blonde, begging him to and squealing about how cute the boys were with one another. And it made Kenny happy to find out there was someone out there who understood. Even if he didn't know he understood quite yet. Maybe Butters would remember, would be the one to comfort him when he came back from the dead.

Kenny tried to look nice, hair pushed back away from his face and his hood down. When he walked into the school eyes were on him, as they usually were when anyone at this school did something out of the norm. He didn't mind, as long as Butter's eyes were on him.

"Fuck is with the get-up? You look like a queer." Cartman snorted first when Kenny approached his friend group.

"Cartman, shut the fuck up for once in your life, okay?" Kyle huffed, then looked to Kenny. "But he is right, dude. What's going on?" 

"I'm in such a good mood, I'm gonna ignore you both." Kenny hummed with a big grin. "I'm asking someone out today."

"Holy shit, casanova is settling down? Alert the fuckin' press." Stan grinned and slugged Kenny's arm.

"That's right. You're looking at what's about to be a taken man. I know I'll leave a trail of broken hearts and great racks behind me, but that's the price you pay for love." 

"Easy, you've only gotten laid once this year, and that was because of me." Kyle raised an eyebrow with a smirk. "You're welcome for that, by the way."

"Fuck off, she was a great lay but I'm making a much better choice now."

Kenny's eyes were scanning around the school until he spotted the blonde. With a hand running through his hair, he shot finger guns at his friends. "Watch and learn, boys. This is how it's done." 

Butters closed his locker and tied his jacket around his shoulders as Kenny approached. Butters looked over and gave his sweet, loving smile. "Hi, Ken!"

"Hey, Butters." Kenny leaned all smooth like on the lockers beside him with a smile. "Look, I'm not gonna beat around the bush here. I got lots I wanna tell ya, but there's something I've been meaning to ask." He took the smaller's hand in his own, "Will you go out with me this weekend?"

Butters blinked and a blush crept onto his pale skin. "Aw, Ken. I-I'm real flattered, but, um." He glanced around at the students passing by, "I-I'm not into boys. N-not that there's anything wrong with it! I-I'm just, y'know... I'm not that way." He pulled his hand back and gave a sheepish smile, "I-I'm sorry. I gotta, um.." He turned off and speed-walked away.

From behind him, Kenny could hear the distinct laughter of Stan and Kyle, who came up behind him. "That's right, boys, that's how it's done. Thanks, Kenny!" Stan snickered and pat his shoulder.

"S-Stan, stop it." At least Kyle had the decency to not laugh directly in his face. "Sorry, dude. Tough break."

\-------------------

'meet me in the locker room.'

Kenny sat with his packed lunch, turning the bruised apple in his hand slowly. His hair was tousled now and he had his hood back up, covering his face. His eyes were focused on Butters, who was sitting with Craig and his friends, purposefully avoiding looking at Kenny- when the fuck did Annie Knits start sitting with them?

He was so lost in his own thoughts that he was late to respond to the buzzing of his cell phone, furrowing his eyebrows at the message from fucking Cartman of all people. What the hell did he want now?

Kenny stood from his table and abandoned his tuna sandwich as he made his way down to the locker rooms where Cartman was waiting for him.

"Dude, what the fuck was that?" The brunette asked as soon as Kenny walked in.

"Uh, tuna? The smell stains." Kenny shrugged.

"I don't care what shitty lunch your mom packed for you, I'm talking about Butters. What were you thinking?" Cartman looked pissed off, and even though Kenny was literally a superhero who didn't fear death, the football star with pure brute strength was still intimidating.

The blonde was caught off guard, hands in his pockets, and eyebrows furrowed. "What are you talking about? Why do you care all of a sudden?"

"Because-" Cartman grit his teeth to try and keep from blowing up. Remember what Butters said, he reminded himself, in through the nose, out through the mouth. "Dude, you asked him out in front of everyone. Don't you get how shitty that is?"

"Uh, what? I have literally no idea what you're going on about."

"Fuckin', of course, you don't. I know this might be hard for you, but maybe put the two brain cells you do have knocking around up there and listen up for once. Rumor gets around this school faster than anything, and Butters has been trying real fuckin' hard to pass. Get it?" Cartman asked venom in his voice, arms crossed tightly around his chest.

"Since when did you give a shit about Butter's reputation?" Kenny felt hot in the face, hands flexing in his pocket and feeling his rough nails dig deep into his skin.

"Rumors go around this school, which gets outside of the school, and then to his parents. They wouldn't take the news lightly. If you actually cared about him, you wouldn't have done that shit." 

"Cartman, that's fucking stupid. Who is seriously gonna go and snitch on Butters like that? Nobody actually gives a shit if he's gay or bi or whatever." Kenny glared at him. "The fuck's your problem?"

"No shit nobody's gonna snitch! But not everyone understands the concept of coming out and how some people can react. Remember how Stan accidentally dropped it to my mom? I was lucky! But Butter's might not be. If you're gonna be all lovey-dovey or some shit, then stay away from him. You're a threat." Cartman pointed an accusing finger at Kenny before shoving past him, making the taller stumble aside and watch him go, confusion, anger, and for some reason, betrayal running through his veins.

When Kenny returned home from school, he slumped onto the couch and covered his face, pulling his hoodie strings taut.

"Kenny!" Karen said excitedly and jumped onto her older brother's lap with a big, excited grin. "How'd it go? Are you guys boyfriends now?" She asked, beating her little hands on his shoulder.

Kenny looked up at the brunette and sighed, smoothing hair out of her face. "Nope, we aren't boyfriends. Butter's isn't like me."

"What do you mean?" Her face fell and her excited hand flaps stilled on his torso. "I thought Butters liked you too?"

"No-pe." He smacked his lips together and sighed, then gave a smile. "It's okay. We're still good friends and that isn't gonna change. Thanks, Karen."

She cocked her head to the side, "Why are you thanking me?"

"Because I wouldn't have had the balls to do that, and you convinced me to be brave. I have a lot to think about, so why don't you make us some ramen?"

She smiled and stood again, "Chicken or shrimp?"

"Shrimp, and add some chili pepper in it." Kenny ruffled her hair as she went off.

Because he did have a lot to think about. He had been thinking all day. Maybe Eric had a point, maybe he shouldn't have tried to out Butters like that. If anyone should know how he was treated, it would be him. But Eric had also outed himself in another way- why was he suddenly so caring? If Butters was trying to keep his sexuality a secret then why, out of everyone in that school, would Eric know? Why was he acting like that?

Kenny turned over thoughts and ideas as the smell of cheap noodles filled the house along with Karen's singing.

What was he missing?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> im gonna be real with you guys, it's been hard to find the motivation to write for this story. not only that but im not sure where i want it to go! but im hoping the more i write and develop the more it will write itself, and im not gonna put out anything i wouldnt want to read myself. so enjoy, and get ready for some new chapters as my motivation (procrastination) grows again :)


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